Well, welcome back again to another podcast of Struggling Well, and you're going to hear some voices that you don't normally hear today. as Suzi and I have two dear friends with us, Joe and Kay Harding. And Joe and Kay, as my wife whistling there, Joe and Kay, serve on our board of Tandem Spirituality, but more than that, Joe and Kay are a unique couple. They've been over 40 years with SIM mission, working primarily in Ethiopia, and at one point living in Ethiopia. So, they have seen two cultures and have lived in two different cultures. we've had the privilege of going to Ethiopia many times with them and working with pastors and wives over in Ethiopia. and what I wanted to invite them to talk about, they're free to talk about whatever, but I want to we this is called struggling well and I think sometimes we maybe get myopic in our thinking that it's just about the US. Well, that's where we all live. but I want them to speak to the issue of what's struggle look like in Ethiopia for the believers for marriages for parenting is it the same as it's here in the states or are there differences in it? So Joe and K I don't know who wants to go first but one of you can jump in and start.
Well there are a lot of similar struggles that we have here in the west and u but there are also other struggles that they have that are of a different nature. I think one of the major ones and this is a scourge for all of Africa is the tribal issues. There's like 80 different groups just in Ethiopia alone. And so that comes up as Christians, you know, that they how can we love this group
of a different tribe and it's caused great tensions and polarization. And so that's something that you know, we have to work through with them. it's, you know, I think in their marriages too, the women just in general are have seemed to be kind of in the background and the men are always in the front. They're the ones who are so doing the ministry. They're the ones that get to go to the conference and the women have always almost always been left out. And so in our times that we've had with couples, for many, this is the very first time that the wife has been able to join the husband.
And that's been just beautiful. And many of them, I mean, poverty is rampant throughout the country. It's one of the poorest countries. And so the wives would come and this was their first time to ever be in a hotel for a conference,
you know. So, but the joy that they had in coming and being recognized was very very significant and it was truly wonderful to see some of this change that's been taking place just over the last 101 15 years is where we really begin to see a change in this I think it's been beautiful to see that transformation and it's been so fun to do those conferences those with Jimmy and Suzi and to see how the Lord has enabled them to connect across very different cultures and yet to get at the heart of some of the issues that really cause us to struggle wherever we're at in the world
as believers. And I think what has been really beautiful to see is the way that as the teaching goes on and as they delve into God's word together how couples they just awaken more to each other and they the some of the issues that they have been silent about surface and we see we you really almost visually we see a healing taking place in marriages as they begin to bring these things to light. And that's been so encouraging. One thing I think that has really blessed us about Ethiopian culture and struggling well is that Ethiopians as many places in the world, but they really struggle in community. They work through a lot of life together in their culture. They don't isolate very much at all. they are they show up for each other. They're a very present culture and that's been a very challenging and beautiful a beautiful thing to see.
Kay, would you say that the individualism of the West has begun to seep into the culture of Ethiopia?
I'm sure on some levels it has with the younger gen. generation perhaps, but it's a very very community-based culture. Just very they do life together. Even the way they eat is they have a round bread and they put sauces and they put it in a round basket or a
or a tray and they all gather round to eat. And it's just a picture of how they do life. You know, when in our culture we can interface with a lot of people that are strugg struggling with loneliness.
Mhm.
I don't remember hearing that word in Ethiopian culture.
Yeah.
People are not lonely. They can feel frustrated perhaps and misunderstood, but they're they share life together so well and they are they really share the word together. They share with one another and it's really enables a lot of the Ethiopians even in the from who've come out of Muslim background to be able to share their faith well with people who are still in Islam or different religions because they care about each other and they're having coffee together, they're eating together and they talk about what they're seeing has changed in each other. They see it's really easy to see each other's lives and to see transformation.
Yeah. In some ways it does I think mirrors the first century church.
Yes.
and so much of when we typically here in the west read whether it's Paul's letters to the Philippians, the Colossians or wherever we read it individually and we see it for us individually and yet it was given in a culture that was very community oriented much like what you guys have described is true in Ethiopia.
Yeah.
So I don't know what your thoughts are, baby.
Well, I've been as you guys were talking about marriages you've seen a lot of transformation in the structure of marriages. And it brings me to that very first trip we took and did a retreat and there were men at the retreat with their wives who did not even know the names of all of their children because they had so many.
things like that are changing within the Christian community. and it's not because they didn't want to, it's just they didn't know. They didn't know. And Joe, tell them about the first that first footwashing that we did with the couples, the men and the women.
That was quite an amazing time. First of all, at the end of our sessions, we wanted to wash the feet of the of those who were present and they did not want that. How can you do that?
And then when we got down to wash their feet, these leaders were just balling. They just couldn't believe this was happening. It was just so I don't know. It was just broke their hearts and it was very very moving experience for us too as well, but for them
and yeah, it was
was that the time that then the cuz you we had washed the feet of the leaders, but then
didn't the husbands wash the feet of their wives and their wives
were not used to being served at all by the husbands? This was just a new teaching. It's amazing how we can in different cultures just kind of sideline some of God's word. word and the whole area of husbands loving and serving their wives and their children has just been dismissed in certain areas and it was just very emotional and very healing. God just brought couples together and we found out afterwards that they there were couples that were really were on the verge of not having their marriages continue and God spoke to them through their word through his word and they oh they took copious notes wrote down every scripture and everything and they just had healing in their marriage and God gave them other couples to bring this teaching and they saw marriages restored from those few verses they were given. It was just powerful. And when we went back a few years later we went to one town where one of the couples that had been in the training was and they invited us to a graduation of the people they had been working with and how many were there?
300 and something.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It was Go ahead.
No, I just was going to say, okay, you mentioned the word of God, which is where we love to focus our thoughts. And I will remember this in one of the times Joe was teaching, he brought this verse from Isaiah 43 to us. And I think it fits as we wrap up what we're doing here this morning. where Isaiah says, speaking for the Lord, remember not the former things, nor consider the things of old. Behold, I am doing a new thing. Now it springs forth. Do you pers do you not perceive it? And that new sense that God is doing something new. Even in the midst of our culture today, even in the midst of the things we don't like that we see around us that we would say we're headed in the wrong direction, or however we want to describe it, God is still at work
and he's doing something new and fresh. every single day. And our hope and prayer is you have listened today is not only will you be encouraged to realize that struggle is a universal problem,
but that God is still the one who is behind everything and he is still working and he's doing a new thing.
Thanks for joining us, Joe K. Thanks for joining us. We'll talk to you again next week.